Wednesday, May 31, 2006
Monday, May 29, 2006
Unbelievable
This post will be especially loved by Liz and Molly.
It is incredible and totally believable if you are as sports stupid as myself. So, I ordered the scooter and it is orange and cream. See the post on the scooter and plug in orange where the lime green is and you will understand what I mean. SO, I was at church talking to a new girl I met. We were discussing the safety hazards of the scooter because our pastor had broken his wrist falling off of his. (Since I WILL hurt myself, this is guaranteed, I will post pictures of my injures.) She asked me what color it was, I said "orange and cream, kind of like a creamcicle." She replied "Yeah, or like the Tennessee VOLES, you know the football team." OH. MY. GOSH. My face just paled in horror. Now, in addition to living in TN I apparently support them in all things sports related and to show my support, I HAVE PAINTED IT ON MY SCOOTER. Here is hoping that the VOLES scooter will stop all the rednecks who speed from indulging in their desire to put a point value on the girl in the scooter and take me out.
It is incredible and totally believable if you are as sports stupid as myself. So, I ordered the scooter and it is orange and cream. See the post on the scooter and plug in orange where the lime green is and you will understand what I mean. SO, I was at church talking to a new girl I met. We were discussing the safety hazards of the scooter because our pastor had broken his wrist falling off of his. (Since I WILL hurt myself, this is guaranteed, I will post pictures of my injures.) She asked me what color it was, I said "orange and cream, kind of like a creamcicle." She replied "Yeah, or like the Tennessee VOLES, you know the football team." OH. MY. GOSH. My face just paled in horror. Now, in addition to living in TN I apparently support them in all things sports related and to show my support, I HAVE PAINTED IT ON MY SCOOTER. Here is hoping that the VOLES scooter will stop all the rednecks who speed from indulging in their desire to put a point value on the girl in the scooter and take me out.
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Gettin out of the bizznas
Oh the stupidity of people when they fly. Having worked for 2 different airlines a total of almost 4 years does not make me exempt. It is almost as though I get temporary amnesia. "Sure! I have no problem paying 8$ for a sandwich which consists of 2 slices of bread and your pawltry turkey, AND I get to bring it on the plane!! Sweet." Or how about, I am sorry, I know I am 3 hours early for my flight, but WHY is it not up on the board? I am ashamed at my stupidity, yet at the moment I would like to think I am better than these people...Why Amercians should not be allowed to travel.
More than half of the stuff I post is a direct rip off from Joshua Blankenship. There I said it, I will say it again, I ain't scared. Actually, I am. Your moustache is out of control! Moustache May/blankenstache
More than half of the stuff I post is a direct rip off from Joshua Blankenship. There I said it, I will say it again, I ain't scared. Actually, I am. Your moustache is out of control! Moustache May/blankenstache
Monday, May 22, 2006
Finally
Some may say "its about bloody time." To those, "yes...yes it is."
Now, those who are talking about the amount of time this has taken are the same that will point out the obvious problems with the scanner.
I DO NOT have tinted glasses. Lets just clear the air on that one. And the photo looks better in person, but in general, no complaints. Happy, kind of like a clam.
Really...really?
I was in blogosphere, trotting along, dare I say it...Almost merrily. I came to Joshuas blog where he had managed to find a web site hosting to folks protesting the Divinci code. The American Society of Tradions, Family and Defense
wish to make it easier for you to find a protest nearest to your location. Now, I am willing to admit I know almost nothing about the book or movie. I know that it proclaims that Jesus slept with Mary M. and that resulted in a child, and some sort of secret crazy catholic offshoot ext. I don't believe that the following will be a popular opinion but I am posting it now. I already have a hard time with the fact that I believe in a triune God, a virgin birth and a salvation by a God man. I do know that I love this Christ, Jesus and the Holy Trinity and my doubts are swept away when ever I get a glimpse of his holiness in worship. These doubts are not what I want to focus on. Basically I just don't find it worth my time right now to read it. I would read it if a friend of mine who was questioning the faith asked me to though. Anyway. You really think a protest is going to stop people? I would go over just to see what the commotion is all about. I don't think you will see me waving my picket sign for this one. Although you never know, I also said I would never move to the deep south, look where that landed me.
wish to make it easier for you to find a protest nearest to your location. Now, I am willing to admit I know almost nothing about the book or movie. I know that it proclaims that Jesus slept with Mary M. and that resulted in a child, and some sort of secret crazy catholic offshoot ext. I don't believe that the following will be a popular opinion but I am posting it now. I already have a hard time with the fact that I believe in a triune God, a virgin birth and a salvation by a God man. I do know that I love this Christ, Jesus and the Holy Trinity and my doubts are swept away when ever I get a glimpse of his holiness in worship. These doubts are not what I want to focus on. Basically I just don't find it worth my time right now to read it. I would read it if a friend of mine who was questioning the faith asked me to though. Anyway. You really think a protest is going to stop people? I would go over just to see what the commotion is all about. I don't think you will see me waving my picket sign for this one. Although you never know, I also said I would never move to the deep south, look where that landed me.
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Part one
this is how I often view sin. It is not pretty, I am scared to let Christ be the propitiation for my sin, to let the Godman take my place and to find him infinatly sweeter than the fleeting moment of pleasure that sin offers. This is part one of a section of the "Great Divorce" by C.S. Lewis my favorite author.
"I saw coming towards us a Ghost who carried something on his shoulder. Like all the Ghosts, he was unsubstantial, but they differed from one another as smokes differ. Some had been whitish; this one was dark and oily. What sat on his shoulder was a little red lizard, and it was twitching its tail like a whip and whispering things in his ear. As we caught sight of him he turned his head to the reptile with a snarl of impatience. "shut up, I tell you!" he said. It wagged its tail and continued to whisper to him. He ceased snarling, and presently began to smile. Then he turned and started to limp westard, away from the mountains. "off so soon?" said a voice. The speaker was more or less human in shape but larger than a man, and so bright that I could hardly look at him. His presence smote on my eyes and on my body too like the morning sun at the beginning of a tyrannous summer day. "Yes. I'm off," said the Ghost. "Thanks for all your hospitality. But it's no good, you see. I told this little chap," (here he indicated the lizard), "that he'd have to be quiet if he came-which he insisted on doing. Of course his stuff won't do here; I realise that. But he won't stop. I shall just have to go home."
"Would you like me to make him quiet? Said the flaming Spirit-an angel, as I now understood.
"Of course I would," said the Ghost.
"Then I will kill him," said the Angel, taking a step forward.
"Oh-ah-look out! You're burning me. Keep away," said the Ghost, retreating.
"Don't you want him killed?"
"You didn't say anything about killing him at first. I hardly meant to bother you with anything so drastic as that."
"It's the only way," said the Angel, whose burning hands were now very close to the lizard. "Shall I kill it?"
"Well, that's a further question. I'm quite open to consider it, but it's a new point, isn't it? I mean, for the moment I was only thinking about silencing it because up here-will, it's so damned embarrassing."
"May I kill it?"
"well, there's time to discuss that later."
"There is no time. May I kill it?"
"Please, I never meant to be such a nuisance. Please-really-don't bother. Look! It's gone to sleep of its own accord. I am sure it'll be all right now. Thanks ever so much."
"May I kill it?"
"Honestly, I don't thing there's the slightest necessity for that. I'm sure I shall be able to keep it in order not. I whink the gradual process would be far better than killing it."
"The gradual process is of no use at all."
"Don't you think so? Well, I'll think over what you've said very carefully. I honestly will. In fact I'd let you kill it now, but as a matter of fact I'm not feeling frightfully wee today. It would be silly to do it now. I'd need to be in good health for the operation. Some other day, perhaps.
"I saw coming towards us a Ghost who carried something on his shoulder. Like all the Ghosts, he was unsubstantial, but they differed from one another as smokes differ. Some had been whitish; this one was dark and oily. What sat on his shoulder was a little red lizard, and it was twitching its tail like a whip and whispering things in his ear. As we caught sight of him he turned his head to the reptile with a snarl of impatience. "shut up, I tell you!" he said. It wagged its tail and continued to whisper to him. He ceased snarling, and presently began to smile. Then he turned and started to limp westard, away from the mountains. "off so soon?" said a voice. The speaker was more or less human in shape but larger than a man, and so bright that I could hardly look at him. His presence smote on my eyes and on my body too like the morning sun at the beginning of a tyrannous summer day. "Yes. I'm off," said the Ghost. "Thanks for all your hospitality. But it's no good, you see. I told this little chap," (here he indicated the lizard), "that he'd have to be quiet if he came-which he insisted on doing. Of course his stuff won't do here; I realise that. But he won't stop. I shall just have to go home."
"Would you like me to make him quiet? Said the flaming Spirit-an angel, as I now understood.
"Of course I would," said the Ghost.
"Then I will kill him," said the Angel, taking a step forward.
"Oh-ah-look out! You're burning me. Keep away," said the Ghost, retreating.
"Don't you want him killed?"
"You didn't say anything about killing him at first. I hardly meant to bother you with anything so drastic as that."
"It's the only way," said the Angel, whose burning hands were now very close to the lizard. "Shall I kill it?"
"Well, that's a further question. I'm quite open to consider it, but it's a new point, isn't it? I mean, for the moment I was only thinking about silencing it because up here-will, it's so damned embarrassing."
"May I kill it?"
"well, there's time to discuss that later."
"There is no time. May I kill it?"
"Please, I never meant to be such a nuisance. Please-really-don't bother. Look! It's gone to sleep of its own accord. I am sure it'll be all right now. Thanks ever so much."
"May I kill it?"
"Honestly, I don't thing there's the slightest necessity for that. I'm sure I shall be able to keep it in order not. I whink the gradual process would be far better than killing it."
"The gradual process is of no use at all."
"Don't you think so? Well, I'll think over what you've said very carefully. I honestly will. In fact I'd let you kill it now, but as a matter of fact I'm not feeling frightfully wee today. It would be silly to do it now. I'd need to be in good health for the operation. Some other day, perhaps.
Sunday, May 14, 2006
Jesus=straight white dude?
The otherday I went into a Christian bookstore and I was gazing at the merchandise aisle. There was one shirt that said "modest is hottest" yet another pair of socks with crosses up the ankle. What are we doing! Really, what are we as a community doing? Would Jesus be offended as to what we have made him? Would he (as many churches suggest) hang out with upper middle class straight white folk? Where would he be found. I am realizing over and over that instead of having our culture come under the authority of Christ we are trying to bend him to our culture. What makes me most angry is that the "idea" of Christian that we have thought up frankly...sucks. We individualize the gospel, and as Gary so eloquently put it "we treat God as a spiritual fitness trainer" using discipleship and mentoring to uplift me to be my "Christian best."
I want to pray the way Colossians 4:2-6 commands: "Pray for us, that God may open a door for our message.." God open the door for your word to flow forth to the Nations, may they not be diluted by what we want you to be, but let your authority, power, goodness and mercy transform lives. Christ may our conversations be full of grace, may those we encounter know to whom we belong.
I will unpack this further, just wanted to throw out some of the ideas mulling in the head. I am so thankful that my old church and the new one have a solid kingdom mentality where the gospel is not self focused but on Christ.
Also, these verses have found new sweetness as he has been restoring the joy of my Salvation again.
"Create in me a clean heart, O God and renew a right spirit within me
Cast me not away from your presence, take not your Spirit from me
restore unto me the joy of my salvation, uphold me with your Spirit." Ps 51
I want to pray the way Colossians 4:2-6 commands: "Pray for us, that God may open a door for our message.." God open the door for your word to flow forth to the Nations, may they not be diluted by what we want you to be, but let your authority, power, goodness and mercy transform lives. Christ may our conversations be full of grace, may those we encounter know to whom we belong.
I will unpack this further, just wanted to throw out some of the ideas mulling in the head. I am so thankful that my old church and the new one have a solid kingdom mentality where the gospel is not self focused but on Christ.
Also, these verses have found new sweetness as he has been restoring the joy of my Salvation again.
"Create in me a clean heart, O God and renew a right spirit within me
Cast me not away from your presence, take not your Spirit from me
restore unto me the joy of my salvation, uphold me with your Spirit." Ps 51
Friday, May 12, 2006
Quotes from the Monk
I walked into the Monks office today and saw this quote. I love it except the word excuse, I am still pondering what I would put in its place.
"The praises of the sick and broken
excuse the silence of the healthy and whole."
"The praises of the sick and broken
excuse the silence of the healthy and whole."
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
happiness on the web
Here are a few videos/random things to keep you occupied on this dreary day in TN and on other more...good days elsewhere, enjoy, I know I did.
Afro Ninja (I DID IT!!! I FINALLY LEARNED HOW TO LINK.) Thank you Peter Schaefer whoever you are!)
Notes to Self The elusive Joshua Blankenship
Fruitful waste of time Thanks to Matt Donovan I spent my lunch hour making my likeness in a South Park character.
StarWars Triumph the Insult Comic Dog visits the folk waiting in line for the "new" movie. I laughed for about a week straight at different intonations and intervals.
Also, I got a promotion. Now, my job titles are the following. "Assistant director of the Chattanooga Community Kitchen" and "Coordinator of Womens Shelter." You however, can call me Karla.
Afro Ninja (I DID IT!!! I FINALLY LEARNED HOW TO LINK.) Thank you Peter Schaefer whoever you are!)
Notes to Self The elusive Joshua Blankenship
Fruitful waste of time Thanks to Matt Donovan I spent my lunch hour making my likeness in a South Park character.
StarWars Triumph the Insult Comic Dog visits the folk waiting in line for the "new" movie. I laughed for about a week straight at different intonations and intervals.
Also, I got a promotion. Now, my job titles are the following. "Assistant director of the Chattanooga Community Kitchen" and "Coordinator of Womens Shelter." You however, can call me Karla.
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
Cheese is my Kryptonite
I knew it. I always knew it, I am lactose intolerant. While I am stating this fact I must also bring up that I am not intolerant to lactose I am hostile towards it. It HURTS me, bring on the world of soy dream, soy cream(an oxymoron), and the like. Please you must refrain on posting about the loss of pizza and cheesy items, I love milk and I might tear up.
Things that have happened since I posted last (you remember basically a millennium ago.)
I worked 74 hours last week alone. I stayed at a women's shelter volunteering and hearing their stories. They were incredible. In reality it was a week in which I learned more about drugs, their forms and pricing than I ever needed to. The Lord sustained each day and really, grace is sufficient unto the day.
The Lord sold my car. Seriously. I am not usually one who attributes everything to "The Lord" (to be said in a breathy voice to catch my drift(although maybe I should be, discuss amongst yourselves.)) You see, it has been rather rainy lately around here. I have been thinking more and more about the useless Saturn taking up the grass in our backyard. I decided to sell, by decided I mean that I thought about it and then proceeded to do nothing. This man Keith came by yesterday to build us another bathroom in the house and noticed it in the backyard. Keith inquired as to if it was for sale, "yep" he got in response. So, 3 hours later Keith brought his friends a lovely Russian couple and 24 hours later the car was sold. The car which has a broken headgasket, needs a clutch and new front brakes and dings sold for $950. They knew what was wrong when they bought it, I aint frontin.
Today I went on the web to look for motorized scooters (Yes, I am that cool) and I found one for $899 that if delivered to my door already assembled would set me back 1,059. Sign me up. What do you think?
Things that have happened since I posted last (you remember basically a millennium ago.)
I worked 74 hours last week alone. I stayed at a women's shelter volunteering and hearing their stories. They were incredible. In reality it was a week in which I learned more about drugs, their forms and pricing than I ever needed to. The Lord sustained each day and really, grace is sufficient unto the day.
The Lord sold my car. Seriously. I am not usually one who attributes everything to "The Lord" (to be said in a breathy voice to catch my drift(although maybe I should be, discuss amongst yourselves.)) You see, it has been rather rainy lately around here. I have been thinking more and more about the useless Saturn taking up the grass in our backyard. I decided to sell, by decided I mean that I thought about it and then proceeded to do nothing. This man Keith came by yesterday to build us another bathroom in the house and noticed it in the backyard. Keith inquired as to if it was for sale, "yep" he got in response. So, 3 hours later Keith brought his friends a lovely Russian couple and 24 hours later the car was sold. The car which has a broken headgasket, needs a clutch and new front brakes and dings sold for $950. They knew what was wrong when they bought it, I aint frontin.
Today I went on the web to look for motorized scooters (Yes, I am that cool) and I found one for $899 that if delivered to my door already assembled would set me back 1,059. Sign me up. What do you think?
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